Saturday night Mr. S and I watched a news commentary about children who live in very poor conditions. I knew I shouldn't have watched it because it would upset me. However, not only was I compelled to keep watching, but to record it.
When I was a teenager, I worked with terminally ill children as a play counselor. These children were so physically needy. Their parents were so spiritually needy, but I wasn't allowed to say anything to them. But oh, did I pray. I prayed nonstop over those sick children. I wish I could have done more.
I wonder now how I could have done that week after week and not gotten depressed. Now, a simple news commentary has had me brooding for days. I told my husband that I wanted to adopt the children we were seeing.
One little boy in particular grabbed my heart. He was homeless, but was so thankful for every little blessing. He was thankful for a roach infested, dirt ridden, thin palate to sleep on at night. For Christmas, one of the key things he wanted, after a house, was curtains. Curtains.
Growing up, I lived 25 minutes from where this little boy lives now. We went sometimes and talked to the people in his town about their souls. I remember staying close to my dad, being afraid at times, and I ashamedly say now, that I looked down on a lot of the people I saw. I felt that I was doing my duty by telling them about Jesus. Sometimes I couldn't wait to get back and breathe the "clean" air of my "perfect" little life.
Some of you know that my parents lovingly adopted me when I was almost one year old.
Who knows what my life could have been?
The little boy that touched my heart could have been me. When he went to kindergarten for the first time, he knew how to count to three, but had no idea that one was supposed to have three meals a day. He was happy if he got one.
I wish I had done more for the terminally ill children that I used to work with, and I wish I could do something for the children I saw last week. I'm just so glad that I got the reminder that I needed.
How shallow I have been ... worrying about the fact that my living room couch doesn't quite match the carpet in our new home.
That little boy could have been me.